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  #1 (permalink)  
Old 01-23-2004, 03:10 AM
Mjulian Mjulian is offline
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Default It Ain't Such a Wonderful Life

FADE IN

INTERIOR OUTER OFFICE .. BETPANAM BUILDING .. DAY

MEDIUM CLOSE SHOT .. People are crowded around the counter. Their muttering stops and they stand silent and grim. There is panic in their faces.

SCOTTY
Now, just remember that this thing isn't as black as it appears.

As Scotty speaks, sirens are heard passing in the street below. The crowd turn to the windows, then back to Scotty

SCOTTY (cont'd)
I have some news for you, folks. I've just talked to old man Spiro, and he's guaranteed cash payments at the neteller. The neteller's going to be fully funded next week.

MAXIMO
But, Scotty, I got my money here.

ADVIL
Did he guarantee this place?

SCOTTY
Well, no, Advil, I didn't even ask him. We don't need Spiro over here.

ADVIL
I'll take mine now.

SCOTTY
No, but you . . . you . . . you're thinking of this book all wrong. As if I had the post-ups back in a safe. The money's not here. Why, your post-up was FatFrank's bonus (to one of the other anxious men). . . and yours too, Dominator. And in Betting Prophets' referral payment and to oldfriends' bonuses for his hundred aliases. Why, you're lending them the money to play with and then, they're going to pay it back to you when they lose it back to us. Don't you see? Am I to confiscate their accounts?

ADVIL
I got two hundred and forty-two dollars in here, and two hundred and forty-two dollars isn't going to break anybody.

MEDIUM CLOSE SHOT .. ANOTHER ANGLE

SCOTTY (handing him a slip)
Okay, Advil, All right. Here you are. You sign this. You'll get your money in sixty days.

ADVIL
Sixty days?

SCOTTY
Well, now that's what you agreed to when you opened your account.

There is a commotion at the outer doors. A man (Areef) comes in and makes his way up to Advil.

AREEF
Advil. . . Advil, did you get your money?

ADVIL
No.

AREEF
Well, I did. Old man Spiro'll pay a hundred cents on the dollar with a 10x rollover.

(shows bills)

CROWD (ad lib)
A hundred cents on the dollar!

AREEF
Yes, matchplay!

ADVIL (to Scotty)
Well, what do you say?

SCOTTY
Now, Advil, you have to stick to your original agreement. Now give us sixty days on this.

ADVIL (turning to Areef)
Okay, Areef.

He starts out.

MINNOW
Are you going to go to Spiro's?

ADVIL
Better to get a 10x rollver thatn nothing.

A few other people start for the door. CAMERA PANS WITH SCOTTY as he vaults over the counter quickly, speaking to the people.

SCOTTY
Advil! Advil! Areef! Now wait . . . now listen . . . now listen to me. I beg of you not to do this thing. If Sprio gets hold of this Sportsbook there'll never be another decent book started in this town. He's already got charge of Olympic. He's got BetJamaica. He's got Oddessa and Chris from Olympic. And now he's after us. Why? Well, it's very simple. Because we're cutting in on his business, that's why. And because he wants to keep you playing his lines and paying the kind of vig he decides.

The people are still trying to get out, but some of them have stood still, listening to him. Scotty has begun to make an impression on them.

SCOTTY (cont'd)
Altice, you play at one of his books, don't you? Well, have you forgotten? Have you forgotten what he charges you for those baseball
lines

(to Peep) Here, Peep. You know, you remember last year when things weren't going so well, the RX dumped you and you had an empty account? You didn't lose your account, did you? No, in fact we gave you a special 50% 3x rollover bonus. Do you think Spiro would have offerred you such a deal?

(turns to address the room again) Can't you understand what's happening here? Don't you see what's happening? Spiro isn't selling. Spiro's buying! And why? Because we're panicky and he's not. That's why. He's picking up some bargains. Now, we can get
through this thing all right. We've got to stick together, though. We've got to have faith in each other.

MINNOW
But my husband hasn't worked in over a year, and I need money.

ANGELLE
How am I going to survive until Kenneth pays me?

JDOG
I got doctor bills to pay.

MTA
I need cash.

NEILM
Can't feed my kids on faith.

Suddenly, as the people once more start moving toward the door, Scotty holds up a roll of bills (the office slush fund) and calls out:

SCOTTY
How much do you need?

SCOTTY (cont'd)
Hey! I got five thousand dollars! Here's five thousand dollars. This'll tide us over until the Neteller is re-upped.

(to Advil) All right, Advil, how much do you need?

ADVIL (doggedly)
Two hundred and forty-two dollars!

SCOTTY (pleading)
Aw, Advil, just enough to tide you over till the bank reopens.

ADVIL
I'll take two hundred and forty-two dollars.

Scotty starts rapidly to count out the money. Advil throws his passbook on the counter.

SCOTTY
There you are.

ADVIL
That'll close my account.

SCOTTY
Your account's still here. That's a loan.

George hands the two hundred and forty-two dollars to Advil, and speaks to Altice, the next in line.

SCOTTY (cont'd)
Okay. All right, Altice?

ALTICE
I got three dimes here, Scotty.

SCOTTY
Aw, now, Altice . . . what'll it take till the neteller is funded? What do you need?

ALTICE
Well, I suppose two bills.

SCOTTY
TWo bills. Now you're talking. Fine. Thanks, Altice.

(to Minnow, next in line)
All right, now, Minnow. How much do you want?

MINNOW
But it's your own money, Scotty.

SCOTTY
Never mind about that. How much do you want?

MINNOW
I can get along with fifty, all right.

SCOTTY (counting it out)
Fifty dollars.

MINNOW
And I'll sign a paper.

SCOTTY
You don't have to sign anything. I know you'll redeposit it when you can. That's okay.

(to woman next in line)
All right, Angelle.

ANGELLE
Could I have seventeen-fifty? I need my pills.

GEORGE
Seven . . .
(he kisses her)
Bless your heart, Of course you can have it. You got fifty cents?
(counting)
Seven . . .

FADE OUT
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  #2 (permalink)  
Old 01-23-2004, 03:13 AM
FatFrank FatFrank is offline
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Default RE:It Ain't Such a Wonderful Life

Good... Very good stuff!
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Old 01-23-2004, 03:18 AM
Dominator Dominator is offline
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Default RE: It Ain't Such a Wonderful Life

Lol..
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Old 01-23-2004, 04:55 AM
jackyl jackyl is offline
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Default RE: It Ain't Such a Wonderful Life

Wow, impressive!
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Old 01-23-2004, 04:58 AM
Altice Altice is offline
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Default RE:It Ain't Such a Wonderful Life

Brilliant stuff!!!!!!!!
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Old 01-23-2004, 05:25 AM
capt capt is offline
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Default RE: It Ain't Such a Wonderful Life

lmao abb your the best
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Old 01-23-2004, 05:54 AM
ChuckyTheGoat ChuckyTheGoat is offline
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Default RE:It Ain't Such a Wonderful Life

lmao, too good!
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Old 01-23-2004, 06:06 AM
timbo37 timbo37 is offline
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Default RE: It Ain't Such a Wonderful Life

Mjulian is brilliant.
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Old 01-23-2004, 10:42 AM
alysheba88 alysheba88 is offline
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Default RE:It Ain't Such a Wonderful Life

Wow, might be the best yet.
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  #10 (permalink)  
Old 01-23-2004, 12:08 PM
entropy entropy is offline
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Default RE: It Ain't Such a Wonderful Life

great stuff Mjulian.
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  #11 (permalink)  
Old 01-23-2004, 02:00 PM
Bobby C Bobby C is offline
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Default RE:It Ain't Such a Wonderful Life

"Post of the year" isn't high enough praise.
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  #12 (permalink)  
Old 01-23-2004, 04:44 PM
Mjulian Mjulian is offline
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Default RE:It Ain't Such a Wonderful Life

Thanks.



capt: abb thanks you too but he is not exactly sure what for.

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Old 01-23-2004, 04:48 PM
stevo stevo is offline
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Default RE:It Ain't Such a Wonderful Life

I needed the laugh. Thanks M.J.[img]i/expressions/beer.gif[/img]
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Old 01-23-2004, 05:53 PM
sledge sledge is offline
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Default RE:It Ain't Such a Wonderful Life

Mjulian another classic from you.......



Please think about writing scripts...You should talk to turkoman....(oh he is no longer with us[img]i/expressions/face-icon-small-sad.gif[/img])
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Old 01-23-2004, 06:31 PM
Minnow Minnow is offline
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Default RE:It Ain't Such a Wonderful Life

Quite an imagination you have there MJ! [img]i/expressions/face-icon-small-cool.gif[/img]
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  #16 (permalink)  
Old 01-23-2004, 10:34 PM
gianfranco gianfranco is offline
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Default RE:It Ain't Such a Wonderful Life

The movie was pretty good too.
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Old 01-23-2004, 11:09 PM
AnotherBadBeat AnotherBadBeat is offline
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Default RE:It Ain't Such a Wonderful Life

[img]i/expressions/face-icon-small-happy.gif[/img]
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Old 01-24-2004, 04:27 AM
areeff areeff is offline
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Default RE:It Ain't Such a Wonderful Life

hiliarious! although you mispelled my name. [img]i/expressions/face-icon-small-smile.gif[/img] I surely want the proper credit [img]i/expressions/face-icon-small-wink.gif[/img]
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Old 01-25-2004, 09:47 AM
The Major The Major is offline
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Default RE: It Ain't Such a Wonderful Life

this is a very funny post Mjulian. You constantly outdo yourself!!!!!
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